Can you name a war or international conflict that was not based on judgement? Judgement about who’s God is right, judgement about people, judgement about value, judgement about ownership. We take our opinions as truth and act upon them as if ours were the only truth. When we all have out only truths, we end up in conflict with each other. And, should enough people agree on an opinion as a truth, we end up with a major political conflict or a war.
Taking this down a level, we see this happening within countries. Look how divided the US is right now – fighting between two truths we call Democrats and Republicans. The two groups hold only opinions but we each take a position and fight for our side as if they were absolute truths.
Bringing the concept down to our own individual lives, we see repeated judgement in our everyday interactions. We judge everything – we are judging machines. “But wait,” you say, “I am not a judgmental person.” Let me challenge you on that. Which is better for you, an apple or an orange? Are sacred cows to be worshiped or eaten? Should a criminal be punished or helped? Is it ok to take something that is not yours? In order to answer each question, you have to make a personal judgement because in reality, there is no absolute truth to the answer to any of these questions. To answer these questions, you must exert your opinion as your truth, and there is nothing wrong with that. But you have indeed made a judgement of some sort.
Know that we are not alone in being a species of judgement. Every deer, bird, mouse and insect is a creature of judgement. How else could it survive? How else would it choose to run from danger instead of towards danger? It must assess its surroundings and make a judgement about its safety in order to survive. Those that judge poorly, find their gene pool ending abruptly in an unfortunate incident. Yes, this is the basis of Darwin’s evolution theory. The creatures with the best judgement survive. So do not feel guilty about your judgement, you need it to survive.
So why then is judgement the root of all conflict? How can an attribute of our being, of all beings, be the root of conflict when it also is the root of keeping us alive? The answer lies in the way in which we humans use judgement. Humans possess something that few other species have – a reasoning mind. All species possess a level of judgement based on universal truth that originates in the primitive brain that operates on instinct. Take fire for example – every animal, bird, reptile and insect flees from fire by instinct. Yet, we humans can reason whether fire is under control or out of control and can easily override our instinct to run from fire using judgement coming from our advanced reasoning mind. Now, why would you choose to move towards a fire? To get warm? To cook food? To use its light to see? To join a group of people? Sure, all that makes sense. All those things result in gaining something beneficial without risk to our survival. That is the power of the reasoning mind.
The reasoning mind also comes equipped with an ego. The ego creates an identity of ourselves that separates us from others. The ego also has a job to protect that sense of self, our sense of identity, and thus the ego is constantly striving to “be right” or make us “right”. The flaw in this is that our ego is made up of nothing but our own life experiences and our opinions about them. There is no basis of universal truth in how our ego interprets and judges things! And yet, it is our ego that drives us. Can you see the little person waving the red flag here???
Let’s look at an analogy that shows us how the ego works. Imagine arriving in a city you have never been to and know nothing about. You have been to many other cities and understand how they are laid out, you know about malls and shopping centers and neighborhoods. You know about crime and police. You know about traffic rules, main thoroughfares and side streets. So, you have plenty of experience and knowledge about cities, but you haven’t ever been to this one. You have been given a list of errands to run for the day and are off to complete those tasks. How do you know where to go, which streets to use, which direction to take? You have nothing to operate on but judgement that comes from your experience in other cities. You will make decisions and you will believe in your decisions as if they were truth until you are proven otherwise. Yet, your decisions are based only on opinions with no supporting evidence for this city. When you find you have taken a correct route getting you to your destination, you are filled with satisfaction and commend yourself for being right. The ego has been rewarded and fed. Now you are more confident on your next decision, right? And this happens again and again until you have completed your list. By then, you are so confident in your navigation abilities that you declare yourself and expert and you will likely always be right in the ways of navigation.
How did we formulate an opinion of ourselves that took us from a complete novice with only opinions to an expert in just a short time? Emotions. Our emotions govern the level of intensity in which we support our opinions. If we feel strongly about something, we are more apt to argue its point than something we do not feel strongly about. And the more strongly we feel about something, the more apt we are to feel we are right. While it is the ego’s job to make us right, it is highly influenced by the intensity of emotion we have about a subject. Emotions supercharge the ego, and this is where we get into trouble.
We get very emotional about our opinions and we see them as truth. But they are not truth, they are just our judgements about things. When we allow our opinions, which result in judgements, to govern our behavior we inevitably end up in conflict with someone or something. On the other hand, if we can see our opinions and resulting judgement just as opinions and not exert them on others, we can find ourselves in a totally different space. We have space to look at things with new eyes and ears. To see that what we think is truth is only how our opinion has been shaped by our life experiences. Then we have the space to ask “why”. Why do I think this way? Why does someone else think another way? Suddenly our world has changed from one of conflict to one of curiosity. And, from curiosity comes learning. From learning comes understanding. From understanding comes peace. So, the next time you find yourself being opinionated, judgmental or critical, pause and ask yourself “why”. See where it takes you. Remember, opinions that are well rooted should grow and change like a healthy tree.